Interview with Gazza

The Fool: Hello everyone to our final interview this year, with none other than this years winner, Mr Gareth John, manager of Bluetastic. Congrats Mr John on winning our league this year, fantastic work and good on you for keeping the Chelsea flag flying high
Gazza: Thank you for having me here for the final interview, and thanks for your recognition of my brilliance!
The Fool: This has been your second year in the league, but the first time featured in an end-of-year interview so could you tell us a bit about yourself?
Gazza: Kiwi guy living in Brazil, married to a Brazilian and we have a daughter.
The Fool: That sound awesome, and you sound like a great catch. So, exactly how long are your walks on the beach?
Gazza: No beach walks as we’re living in Sao Paulo city.
The Fool: I guess that is not known for its great beach walks. Anyway, has the 3rd Annual 9642 Fantasy League changed you in anyway?
Gazza: It has made me appreciate some *gag* Tottenham players.
The Fool: That is the power of fantasy football, it makes you realise that even the worst players can still score you good points. Since you sweep everyone this year, can you share some of your winning strategy with us simple plebs?
Gazza: Don’t be afraid to spend points to do multiple player swaps.
The Fool: That sounds like useful advice. Moving away from 9642 fantasy football, what do you like to do with your time outside of 9642 Fantasy Football?
Gazza: I try to find time to play some PS4, however this is difficult between work and looking after my daughter. I am also Playing 5-a-side football with locals who can’t say my name so refer to me as Bale.
The Fool: Bale! I guess that is the only other Gareth they know; although I prefer to hear it in a wonderful Brazilian accent and rhyming with Pele. Anyway, how’s the wife? Brazil treating you well?
Gazza: Luisa is doing well and Brazil is treating me well. I have only been mugged 4 times so far this year, a record low.
The Fool: Yay for record low muggings! Although maybe you have just put a curse on the rest of your year. Moving onto the EPL, how good was Chelsea this year?
Gazza: Chelsea, as you would expect, were awesome this year, though i’m concerned about some of the players we’re selling, such as Matic to Man U.
The Fool: Yeah, the transfer strategy this off-season has been a bit chaotic to say the least, but it has been that way for a few years now. Hopefully someone with some sense will put an actual plan into place and we will get some quality players. Assuming we get some good players, how many trophies will Chelsea win next year?
Gazza: Chelsea will win 3 trophies next season.
The Fool: Good prediction; personally I like to believe we can win all 4 trophies we are competing for, but then again I am known as a one-eyed Chelsea supporter and not a realistic one like you. Ok, we are nearly at the end of our interview, so just a few more questions to ask. Next, if you could be any superhero, who would you be?
Gazza: Who else…I am Batman!
The Fool: Who else indeed! Nanananananananana. Now finally, will pineapple lumps, jaffas and pinky’s ever taste the same now they will be made in Australia?
Gazza: Pineapple lumps no, jaffas yes, and who cares about pinky’s.